“Didn’t I say I was tired of looking up and seeing that you’d written some song or poem or piece about me? It’s getting old Michael.”
“You did. And yea, I know. But so…what? Because you asked nicely I’m supposed to stop being inspired by you??”
“ (lol) YES!!”
“(heh)…guess that’d make it a whole lot easier…for YOU huh?”
“Well it sure wouldn’t hurt!”
“(lol) It’d hurt me! I’ve tried,… To actively NOT think or write or sketch about you. I’ve managed a good deal of success with that too! It definitely helped me to open my creative mind back up to the world outside of romantic love and what that can inspire and bring out of me.”
“…and that’s exactly what I’d love to see you do more of! Sure a girl loves to be the subject of a song two, but I don’t wanna see you waisting your talent on me….Not that the stuff you’ve written about me is a waiste :) …But your perspective needs to be articulated on everything you can! Not just love.”
“I know. I know. And I’m working on it. Promise. ‘workin on it!’ (lol)”
“Plus, you’re gonna look up and be real sad when you finally realize it’s over, and you’ve done all this stuff about one person that you’re not even with. One person? ONE subject!? C’mon! what kind of resume will that read like? You wanna be well rounded so that the love pieces will stand out!”
“(lol) Why do I feel like this is all a ploy to ensure that the stuff I’ve done on you will remain the greatest of it’s kind? What are you REALLY up to huh??”
“Heh…Me?!? YOU’RE the Master Manipulator remember!? (lol)”
“….You know I hate that shit.”
“I know. That’s why I said it. Besides, I’m still not quite over you lying to me for the better part of a year. I really did feel like you completely mind fucked me man. Like, it’s all still pretty sick that you were even able to do that. Let alone to me, the one you claimed to love oh so much. Love doesn’t do what you’ve done. And don’t bring up all the shit I’ve done. None of that justifies your lies. I was always honest with you. However ugly the truth was, at least you got it up front. Wish I could say the same for you..wha…Why are you smiling!?!?”
“….Cause…You’re really cute when you get to monologing about how shitty a guy I am. Especially when I already know all that you’re gonna say. You get yourself worked up so easily. It’s the cutest thing.”
“….I’m serious Michael!...”
“Wha!?...No seriously, you think I don’t know?? Why do you think I went outta my way to try and come clean!? It doesn’t feel good knowing how deep I went with it all. And frankly…I’m still dealing. Today.”
“Why? I forgave you didn’t I?? …Let it go. You shouldn’t walk around with that on your spirit.”
“But I do.”
“Well don’t. I mean, move on man! Go date! Swoon! Get laid! Write about it! You’re free! No strings. No…girl hundreds of miles away to feel obligated to call or be faithful, but not really, to. You’ve got a lot of good going for you. Go enjoy yourself!”
“You think I haven’t been doing all those things?? I have. I told you. I was actively moving on, and it was working well enough….But you don’t just wake up one day and DECIDE you’re ‘over’ someone. There is no such thing as falling out of love. Not if it’s true! …..There’s BEING in love, and then there’s KNOWING you’re in love. And neither of those necessarily require the participation of two people! Which is why all those guys from back in the day wrote about unrequited love, cause they ass was in love alone!....S’gotta be a sad state of affairs. I mean, I can’t really identify with that tho…”
“ heh. Oh really!??”
“Drop it! Just cause you wish you didn’t love me doesn’t make saying you don’t any less false.”
“Sure I love you Michael. I’ll always love you. Just like I’ll always love David, and Marcell, and-”
“-Fuck them, and fuck that. Don’t even give me that shit. You know what I mean.”
“(lol) For all you know I could be in a committed relationship, and you’re sittin’ real high thinkin’ you know somethin’ about what I’M feeling.”
“Well…Are you?....In a relationship I mean?”
“Hmph…never know.”
“See!? THAT’S the shit I’m talkin about! Cause even if you are, you’re still here with me eating this up. ‘Oh he’s so pathetic! Why won’t he just get over it! I wonder what he’ll say next…”
“What if I just enjoyed flirting, eh? Wasn’t it you who always told me flirting can be sooo innocent?”
“…Yea ok. You got it.”
“Michael, listen. I’ve told you, I forgave you. Really. It hurts sometimes when I think of what could’ve been and all we did to mess that up…well, well mostly what you did….but it’s cool. I’m cool. And you’ll be too. I’ve said it and I’ll say it again. I have no intention of being with you again.”
“…Well, what ‘you’ are you talking about, cuz…ya know I’m a different me than I was even just twenty minutes ago, ya know?? I mean, Neo wasn’t the one till the END of the movie when he could see the numbers in the air n’ shit?....JESUS didn’t even start telling people he was Christ till his ministry, and that didn’t begin till he was like thirty som’n!.....Not trying to liken myself to Jesus or some futuristic digital world war savior, but, I mean…you know what I’m saying (lol)….What if it IS you, and if it IS me, it’s just that our time hasn’t come yet?”
“….That’s kind of far-fetched, don’t you think?”
“Not really…”
“Hmph……Peace Michael. Take care of yourself.”
“….Pray for me!?”
“God can hear you just fine.”
“Does that mean you won’t pray for me??”
“No.”
“….(then what does she mean!??...)”
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